Our world is made up of many different experiences. Whether they are good or bad, we find ourselves being defined by the choices we make. It is within these experiences that we can find out who we are as people.
On May 13th, 2007 at 1:00 a.m my world stopped. I had constantly told myself nothing bad could happen to me. I was only 18. However, I was in for a rude awakening. With each step I found myself feeling as if I shouldn’t go. It was as if there was something wrong with this scenario. The blur of a party scene plays out, much like the ones before. When my ride had bailed I looked to my significant other. My brother and I had curfew and we couldn’t be late.
As I stepped out of the car to get in the front seat, I found that strange feeling of dread engulf me. It was as if my house was screaming at me to come home. I ignored every instinct in my body except the urge to put my seatbelt on. Little did I know this would be the best decision I had made in my life. We stopped at the first stop sign with ease, like a habit you couldn’t kick. It wasn’t until we reached the end of my street that I realized how much I wanted to be home.
The intensity of the car was suffocating to the point that my heart begged to get out. The rain pounded and the speedometer increased. With the next stop sign in sight, I found relief. However, this time no relief would be in sight. As quickly as we had gotten to the stop sign it passed. A blur of light in my eyes, as my head lifted to see what was happening. It was then that life was complicated. With a hit to every side of my head my breath was gone, and I realized that this could be the end of everything.
My mouth unable to scream, I turned to panic. I hear screaming around me but see no one. It is then that I realize it is me screaming. Screaming to get out of the car, I find the remnants of a door, and a hole to climb out of. Like the scene from a horror film, the night plays out. As the rain flows down my face I wipe it away. Kneeling on the ground, I hold my head in my hands. I look up from my hands and the blood just drips down my arm. It is then that I realize that my life has changed.
That night changed everything. I lost my will to leave the house, hangout with friends, and eat. A large depression had set in. I had never cried so much in my life. Physically and emotionally bruised and broken, I realized that I had the power to move beyond this. With every step I found myself appreciating the world around me. However, with every serious incident that occurs you have to choose your reaction. I realized that I wouldn’t be able to do this on my own. Seeking therapy and someone to confide in I found myself feeling relieved. It wasn’t until I really understood how to deal with this happening that I could move beyond it.
I look back now and find that I would never take back this experience. It is this particular experience that has made me a better person. I had always taken things for granted when I was younger, but now I find myself living each day with sincerity. We are only as strong as we allow ourselves to be. I chose to remain strong and hope that anyone who hits a wall, no matter how big or small, finds a way to make it positive. In the end we only have experiences to look back on, and you should never allow the happenings of the past to ruin you.